I was only six when my parents informed us (my brothers and me) on the break-up, only six when my dad moved out, and only seven when their divorce became official. Even now at the age of 14, I remember it all too well. How could any child possibly not remember “the speech” and the break-up?

Along with the sad divorce talks, later came the “engaged to be married” talks. For me, those were just as hard, just as surprising, and just as predictable. I am part of two blended families. I have a step mom and a to-be step dad who each have 4 kids of their own - two boys, two girls each. Trust me; I understand how complicated and how tough it is to be a part of a newly combined family. I know the resentment, anger, and jealousy felt towards parents and the new additions. I was annoyed by the attention my step mom got from my dad and the new rules we had when we had moved in with her. My stepbrothers and I didn’t get along very well either. I felt like they were taking my brothers away from me - we were supposed to be sticking together!

The Canadian Disney Channel series 'Life with Derek' deals with the complications of a blended family.

Then I met my older stepsister. I had always wanted a sister and it surprised me how perfect she was at being the sister I had always desired. She liked doing my hair, makeup and playing games with me. At the time she was the only one I was really happy with - the only person I felt no resentment or anger towards. She was my instant pain reliever. I was temporarily comforted.

My parents’ divorce was a, to say the least, depressing time. I cried myself to sleep a lot, got into trouble with my dad, and constantly argued with my step mom. I was annoyed with the changes she was making in our daily lives and the changes that even my father went through to please her.

One of my favorite films - Stepmom deals with a family dealing with a remarriage.

Today, there are over 15 million children whose parents have gone through a divorce and approximately 3.6 million families that are blended currently in the United States. Divorce is a tough fact to register, especially for children and teenagers. It is a much tougher concept for children to understand, but teenagers deal with their parents’ break-up slightly different from a child.

The teenage years are generally known as the most “rebellious” years of a person’s life and with a teen’s parents splitting up, they feel encouraged to rebel. They find whatever they can to take they’re mind off of the split up, especially when they feel they are the main cause of the separation. Some adolescents side with one particular parent because they may have come to the conclusion that it is one parent’s “fault.” Sometimes they deal with their anger in the most aggressive or passive-aggressive way. They might get into drugs, drinking, partying, and pure recklessness. Others show their anger by giving their parent(s) the silent treatment or they find a way to constantly argue with them on every subject. As a matter of fact, young women whose parents have gone through a divorce are twice as likely to drop out of high school or give birth to an out-of-wedlock child.

Get into sports and write in a diary instead of taking your anger out on someone else

Of course this doesn’t apply to every teenager, but most teens tend cope with the split irrationally. There are ways to manage your anger without haste like writing in a journal, talking to someone, relaxing by taking a bath or reading a book, playing a favorite game or sport (I know this may sound a little…well a little hokey, but if you’re going through a break-up in your family, you sometimes feel alone - these times are very serious).

Every child and young adult needs to have some sort of hobby or something to resort to when in tough times.

Divorce is rough, but it is usually for the best. It’s actually a good thing that certain parents break-up because it would definitely be a much more difficult house to grow up in if they didn’t - they would argue all the time and make the children suffer more. Times may be harsh going through a divorce, but wouldn’t it be worse if they didn’t?

Sources:
Statistics quoted in this article courtesy of divorcepeers.com and divorce.lovetoknow.com