Do you like being sad? No? What about being afraid? Chances are you don't like that either. But it's quite possible that you've recently read a Nicholas Sparks novel or watched a movie featuring a psycho killer. There's some inconsistency with this. We tend to consider fear, pain, and sadness as negative emotions, yet we also seek out things that we know will evoke that reaction in us. Why?

All emotions have a purpose: they let us know what's going on around us and allow us to take some form of action. For example, if you're in a dangerous or threatening situation, the fear that you feel tells you to remove yourself from that situation. If you're around people who often make you upset and angry then your emotions tell you that these aren't healthy relationships. But we usually seek to avoid negative emotions. In general pleasure is considered good, and pain is considered bad. We remove ourselves from situations that evoke negative feelings in us as a way to preserve ourselves and stay safe and healthy. So is there something unhealthy about listening to sad music on the radio or watching a movie that you know is likely to give you nightmares?

Stephen King knows something about scaring people. He's made his living doing just that for several decades. In 1981, in article entitled “Why We Crave Horror Movies”, King said that he believes that there are several reasons that people are drawn to his work: to movies and books that frighten them. He says it's the same reason that people- particularly young people- like roller coasters: “...a really good horror movie may... surprise a scream out of us at some point, the way we may scream when the roller coaster twists through a complete 360 or plows through a lake at the bottom of the drop. And horror movies, like roller coasters, have always been the special province of the young; by the time one turns 40 or 50, one’s appetite for double twists or 360-degree loops may be considerably depleted.” Another reason according to King, is that it makes us feel normal: even if you don't look like a supermodel, chances are you're more attractive than Freddy Krueger! Moreover it allows us to enter a world where there are few ambiguities or shades of grey. In real life sometimes it's hard to tell who is good and who isn't. It's even harder to decide if “good” and “bad” even exist in the real world: most people have qualities of both in them. But in a scary book or film we can know that the guy chasing people around with an ax is bad!

However King goes further, saying that all emotions need to be exercised once in the a while in the same way that we need to exercise our bodies. “Certain of these emotional muscles are accepted – even exalted – in civilized society; they are, of course, the emotions that tend to maintain the status quo of civilization itself. Love, friendship, loyalty, kindness -- these are all the emotions that we applaud” But we don't applaud all emotions. Some we keep locked up: anger, fear, rage, violence. We keep these under control. But horror as a genre speaks to the emotions that exist in all of us, that we don't let out “It deliberately appeals to all that is worst in us. It is morbidity unchained, our most base instincts let free, our nastiest fantasies realized . . .” According to King, we seek out scary things because in our real life when someone treats us badly we don't go on a murderous rampage. And we shouldn't! But every once in a while it's fun to escape into a pretend world without those restrictions.

Perhaps that explains the appeal of the frightening, but what about the tearjerking? If you bought a ticket to see Dear John or picked up a copy of Suzanne's Diary For Nicholas, or popped Titanic in the DVD player recently, chances are you weren't expecting a lot of laughs. Chances are you were looking to have a good cry. Dr. Brigit Wolz, a psychotherapist and “cinematherapist” says that people often find the painful emotions that are released when indulging in something sad, to be helpful. Like Stephen King, Dr. Wolz believes that watching a movie or reading a book allows us to confront our feelings in a safe way. We identify with the characters in a story. We are often happy when they're happy, sad when they're sad and scared when they're scared. However we know that it's not real. We know that ultimately an actor is pretending to be the person on the screen. This gives us a feeling a safety, and with that feeling of safety we can let go of our emotional defenses and confront feelings that we might otherwise be afraid to let loose. Dr. Wolz often uses films as a way for her patients to confront issues that they're dealing with. She mentions the films Affliction, The Hours and Duet For One as having been particularly helpful in her practice in terms of helping her patients deal with issues relating to depression, childhood trauma, illness, and loss. When we watch a sad movie or read a sad story or listen to sad music and have a good cry, we're letting some of those painful feelings out. When we get these negative feelings out, we feel better. Sometimes, when we sense we need that release, we'll turn on some sad music or pop in a DVD which we know will tug our heartstrings, and know that we'll get a good cry.

So the next time you feel like buying a ticket for the latest slasher flick, or staying in with a DVD and a box of tissues, go for it. Chances are some part of you wants the safe, protected release of feelings that it will offer.